Lol! I died reading this. I’m guessing I’m the only female who enjoys getting coffee and going to a park? Or is it because I’m still relatively young? :)

Honestly, I don’t know who came up with the idea of having a first date at a restaurant. It’s often somewhat loud, you cannot always hear each other properly, and when the chewing starts it gets even harder. Instead of talking, you’re chewing. Instead of getting to know each other, you’re getting distracted by a waitress, or a food runner, or the couple next to you fighting. You drop food on the floor and feel like a pig. You try to eat pasta in a flirtatious way, but end up looking like a maniac.

Also, I hate eating dinner, and I usually only drink tea and maybe eat a small snack after 5 pm. Every time someone invited me to a restaurant, I end up barely eating anything and just watch my date eat.

Not to mention, I’ve encountered more than one guy who calls females goldiggers for offering a restaurant date instead of a coffee date. Side note: I always offer to pay for my share and I will still see the guy for the second date if he allows me to. But they don’t know that, lol.

Anyway, I’m happy with a Tim Hortons’ coffee and a pleasant conversation. But your article is hilarious. You should consider writing for publications.